Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Mari's Buildings

Although we spend the majority of our time bonding with Misha, we do spend part of each visit with Mari. She lives on the third floor of the large building across from the main Administration/School Building. She shares a room with Christina, Marina (visited the US with a host family with Mari’s program), Ina (sick in bed our first few days and now at the Hospital), and Alina (also visited the US with a host family on same trip).

Her Caregivers/Teachers, Svetlana and Julia (one is on duty at all times), are responsible for Ѕ of a floor of her building. The kids are around the same age, and include boys and girls. This may not quite be a problem at this age, but apparently there is some bed hopping in the older kids. We would rather see the girls on one side of the wing or all on one floor and the boys on another. There is several couches and a TV, with DVD player, in one room and a large closet system in another room, the kids share a bathroom with three toilets (no seats) with a sink outside the restroom door for handwashing.

Next to the toilet room is a shower room with two large showers. When Mari saw that we were bringing Misha’s group shampoo, bath soap bars, and toothpaste, she asked “What about me?”. None of the kids in her area had any toiletries. Teeth are brushed with water, hands are washed with cold water (hot water is not available in town except for 8-10 am and 7-9 pm), and no shampoo. We are now toiletry fairies and leave the kids soap and toothpaste under their pillows (where they “hide” all of their personal things). The shower room floor was flooded and clothing was thrown into the water the first day I was there.

The hallway was a mess. Unknown to me, Svetlana was busy painting the room that had yet to receive the new closet system. Baseboards had been pulled out and wallpaper stripped. A broken dresser, without drawers, was at the end of the hallway. I though this was the normal state of existance. In one room, all of the suitcases from the kids who had been in the hosting programs over the summer were piled onto one side, about 8 feet deep – and they were still full. One smart boy, sitting on the floor in a foot deep of new clothes, was busy opening zippers to pillage the contents within the suitcases (looking for candy and other goodies). It sickened me to see this pile as I knew how hard I worked to wash and iron and make matching outfits for Mari for her return. I also packed presents for her teachers, school supplies, wall-mount pencil sharpeners (the metal ones, $15 a pop at Staples), and a bunch of toys for Misha’s group (which I have still not seen).

The first day, the Caregiver – who I had not me yet – accosted the little boy, Mari and myself and yelled at us for being in the room. She then locked the door behind us. We didn’t know what to think of the room of suitcases and the mess. As the week wore on, we saw the hallway slowly get cleaner and realized that Svetlana had been busy preparing the room across the hall for a new bunch of cupboards with doors (floor to ceiling) which have been installed. The “suitcase room” is now half-empty, the floor swept, and the remaining suitcases that have yet to be unpacked are stacked on the opposite wall. The room is kept locked unless Svetlana is working on it. We were very releaved to see that the clothing is being used for the children and that it was just an organization project!

Mari attends school, at the Internot, right on the grounds from 9 am until 12:30 pm. She then walks to the Cafeteria Building for lunch. After lunch the kids have a few hours of free time, then they may have a class (sewing was this afternoon), and homework time (everyone back in the classroom at 5:00 with Svetlana helping them with any questions). At 6:00, she is usually done with homework and at 7:00 is dinner time.

When in school, the outhouse is used outside. The only indoor restrooms are in the dorm buildings. Sorry about the graphic photo of one of the outhouse holes. The bench is 1 ft. off the ground, to accomadate the littlest ones probably, although I would never sit on the bench after realizing it probably hasn’t been dry since it was built. The contents of the outhouse are about a foot from the holes – about time to dig a new pit and move the outhouse! There is no toilet paper outside and after helping Misha, who pulled his undies up after doing a no. 2 (I had to stop him and have him bend over for me), I doubt that the larger kids worry about this. Mix this with a shower once a week, without soap, and I am so thankful that I was born a middle-class American!

Thank you for your comments! They are our only bright spot, besides the kids, and the farm animals that we encounter every day! Our Facilitator is not with us as families usually return for the 10 day wait. After he met with the Regional Inspector and the Director and the Notary, he left us early in the trip. After almost a week he returned for the preliminary court hearing and the court hearing, to leave again. We are here without a driver also, our choice as we would rather pay the local taxi daily then for the driver’s lodgings.

It is hard enough to communicate with the taxi driver on daily needs let alone sightseeing. I have been writing it out for clarity, that we want to be picked up and taken to the computer lab, where John works for a few hours, and then we shop for fruit (bananas, watermelon, grapes, or peaches), snack foods (cookies, crackers, chips, or cereal), milk or juice. We then carry everything about a mile to the Orphanage.

John is my pack mule and I always feel bad as he has his computer in his backpack on his back also. The taxi driver then picks us up at 6 pm every evening at the Orphanage Gates. Without Stefanie and Bill at the onset of the trip, we would be lost as to how to navigate in this community. We are now braver and just walk up to a building we are curious about and open the doors! So far, we have found a ballet class, a large auditorium, a store than sells yarn and embroidery floss, several 7-11 type stores, a store that sells womens clothes, and a hardware store.

Everyone looks at us and we are known as “the Americans”. We are even referred to as this at the Hotel – where we have lived for two weeks now and know each of them by name. We are strangers in a strange land, and viewed with suspicion rather than curiousity (remnants of the Cold War). Very few people return our smiles, although everyone returns our “Hello” in Ukrainian. A few of the very old babuskas, who are gardening or sitting by their gates, are the only ones who eye us with curiousity.

The younger generation thinks Americans are rich and have Ferraris – we were told this at dinner one night by one of the locals who was kind enough to try to talk to us in English. I know we keep our two parked in the garage. Mine is a very special Honda Odyssey Minivan/Ferrari that I just love! They must have us confused with the Italians (or the residents of Kyiv, where there are more Mercedes than in Stuttgardt where they are manufactured)! Not sure what they are watching on TV to give them this idea - other than music videos!

Lots of love from “The Americans”!

8 comments:

Mare said...

We sure do take alot for granted don't we. Hot/cold running water, indoor plumbing, heating and on and on....
Grandma and Duncan are in our prayers as well as you guys and all the kids. Too bad we aren't closer and could help out! It will be worth all the sacrifices soon!!

A walking ATM machine.....that's a great visual! I wish I had one of those...

LOTS OF LOVE AND HUGS to you!!! M,M&M

Joe, Wendy, Graham, Elizabeth and Kolya said...

Yes, a walking ATM that spits out $100 bills! Remember when I tried to save some money on the driver? I ended up crying the entire day! By the time you get close to coming home you actually start getting angry at these gready people because you get so low on cash and I was panicking. But now that I am home the anger is gone and I only remember the good parts. I took Kolya to the dentist yesterday to get a cavity filled. The cleaning went really well last month. We decided to give him a little nitrous oxide to relax him during the numbing phase but he didn't like that too much so we took it off. He flipped out when the dentist started to drill. We knew he could not feel anything but we suspected he was waiting for the pain of hitting a nerve. The poor child was a wreck. So we will have to go under anesthesia to get 2 cavities filled. A little bit of the anger returns when you realize what they do to their children over there. I am just thankful that he is with us now and gets love and hugs even if he thinks he's too tough to need them.

Heidi and Felix said...

John & Twyla,

Thank you for the detailed words that paint so vivid a mental picture of what it is like there. It's only been since April, but I forgot how things were.

Heidi and I regret that we haven't/didn't spend more time with you this past year, even though we live only a few miles away. We hosted on the same FH trip this year, but we never got the kids together. I apologise for that. Reading your blog and having Heidi tell me your history, it seems as though we lived the same experience as you did. We too lost the kids we hosted the first time and we are hoping to adopt a sibling set we housed during our recent UOO camp.

I guess what I am saying in all of this rambling (sorry), is that we feel a kinship with you our fellow bother and sister in Christ and we would love the opportunity to get to know you more and get the kids together once you and we return from Ukraine. (Our appointment is Nov 10th, if I din't metion it before.)

If there is anything we can do for you or for your family here in CO, please call on us...we will be there in a second! We live and work near you house and would love to be of assistance. Enjoy your time there and tell Papa-Bear John to quit working so hard.

Yours in Christ,
Felix Rogé

Kari said...

Hi, Guys!
We love reading your detailed posts. Makes me wonder how all of the stuff we sent back with Olga & Vova was distributed, not to mention the 21 suitcases of donations we sent back with the UOO kids. We are still not clear if we should request some of the kids we met this summer or go blind as originally planned. We need prayer for God's wisdom. It is amazing how quickly they brought in new kids after the Krebs family left. I guess that is good since there are so many kids that need care. We still can't imagine what it will be like in Ukraine, but your posts help give us some idea. You continue to be in our prayers.
Kari

Val :) said...

Thank you for the wonderful ability to get inside the orphanage where our Marina resides. Hosting her was a wonderful experience, and we often wondered what her life was like in Ukraine.
I sure hope that her suitcase is one of those that have been returned to their owner - or else it will be shortly. We do spend a lot of time on the contents going back don't we????

adopting2fromUkraine said...

Hi,

I just read some of your blog today. Your posts bring back memories of our recent trip. We've been home for over five months now with our 12yo daughter.

I also have wondered what happened to donations and such that our camp kids took back.

When we were waiting for our daughter's passport, we visited the orphanage with some dolls to give to certain girls we met during our stay. As soon as the dolls were disbursed, they had traded hands! It is just the orphanage way. The kids either give or take from each other.

If the donations are taken care of by the director or other caregivers, they are usually disbursed a little at a time as needed. This was our observation at our daughter's orphanage anyway. You would think that the kids would appreciate things since they have nothing, but from what I saw, possessions didn't mean a whole lot. They don't take care of things. They still don't mean that much to our daughter. There is no sentiment there. Our daughter gave away every single thing we gave her except for a pair of jeans that were so worn out by the time we got home I threw them away.

Best wishes on a smooth and quick process.

June

Debora Hoffmann said...

I love hearing what you Americans are up to. ;-) Your experience is fascinating, and I'm eager to see you all come home! So do the people in your region speak Ukrainian instead of Russian? Where Elaine lives, Russian is the dominant language, but she knows Ukrainian too; she takes it in school.

Stefanie and Bill said...

Hi Fellow Americans!
We are in Kiev, bored to tears litteraly.
We miss you guys as it was so wonderful to see your familiar faces each day.
The day we picked up the boys, I figured there was some uninvited guests in their hair as Patrick smelled of some funky chemical and the cartaker was looking through their hair. Thank God, he didnt bring any with him.
We are picking up the passports tommorrow. Thank God. Maybe we will see you in Kiev.
Cant wait to see you guys at home.